grandma

my grandma isn't doing too well. we don't know what is wrong because she is christian science and does not go to a doctor, but instead prays and uses a practitoner. i guess you'd call a practioner a proffessional pray-er. anyway, i went to a family function and visited grandma and grandpa before hand because grandma wasn't going (she hasn't been out of her chair for almost a month). thats when i found out she isn't well. so we get to the family function and there are all these whispers about the fact that there is not going to be christmas because grandma can't do anything. even though no one has acctually talked to her. i know that unless she was really really ill, she'd be fine with having everyone move around her and do things instead of just cancelling chrismas alltogether. my aunts and uncles who arn't christian science are pissed cause they don't know what is wrong. my veiw is that she is an adult, of sound mind, if not body, who has practiced her beliefs for ever, and even lost a daughtor due to them, so let her make up her own mind, and be loving and supportive even if you don't get it. roumor has it that no one has called or visited since she got sick. i mean, even if you where seeing a doctor, you still need support and love, so why when you arn't you arn't getting the love and support you need. any who, i wrote an e-mail to my family and this is what it said:

Dear Family,

It was nice to see most of you yesterday. Thank you for all your love and
congratulations. ...but I know someone else who could use your love and
support more than me at the moment. My Grandma Grove. I just found out yesterday
that she is struggling with being confined to her chair for almost a month. I
didn't ask what was "wrong" because I know that it is not in her belief system
to be ill. To some of us she is ill, and to some of us she is a Perfect
Child of God who is struggling with something. Regardless of what WE believe, she
needs our love. Regardless of what WE believe, she knows she does not need a
doctor. I KNOW what she needs right now is our LOVE. Grandma would need our
love and support if she believed in doctors and had gone to see one, and she
needs our love and support now, when she is doing everything she knows how to
do. Maybe we don't understand why she is doing what she is doing. Maybe she
didn't understand why Peter took the medical
route when he was diagnosed with diabetes. But she (as far as i know with
out putting words in her mouth) kept loving and supporting though it.
I personally am scared because I don't know what is "wrong". We fear the
unknown right? Will it really make everything better if we "know" what is
"wrong"?
I know I have to cast aside my fear, and trust Grandma because she trusts
God. Maybe I don't trust God, but I have to trust Grandma because I love her and
she loves me. And she loves you. And to risk sounding preachy, God loves
you. I do not consider myself to be Christian Science. Maybe not even
Christian anymore...but I do know that I am loved. And you are loved. by me, by
grandma, by each other and by God.
Please tell her you love her and support her. Stop surrounding her with
negative energy. Stop waiting for "the call". Stop thinking that there is only
two more weeks till Christmas I hope she makes it. 'Cause part of the not
knowing what is "wrong" is being there NOW because we don't know. No doctor is
going to be able to tell you how long she has. She has as long as God has
given her. "illness" or not.
As much as she seems it, Ruth Grove's body is not immortal. And she needs
your love more than ever right now. We need each others love and support right
now and always.

Please know that no one asked me to write this e-mail. No one suggested it.
I did it all by myself. Because I noticed the lack of communication and the
whispering. Because I decided to take action. Because when talking to my
cousins I noticed they where as scared and worried and as uninformed as I am. We
are a FAMILY. We don't need to discuss "the Problem" in great detail, 'cause
there isn't any detail, but we do need to communicate.

I'm praying because thats what Grandma believes.

I love you all very much.
Rebecca


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i just wonderd why i was sharing this. i think i'm sharing it because i need to know i did the right thing. did i do the right thing in standing up to my family? so far an uncle and a cousin have replyed and have been supportive. but who knows. and i guess i can't really make anything worse for grandma.